Monday, August 18, 2008

American Politicians and Religion

I find the interface between religion and politics in the USA to be most amusing. Watching, for the most part, irreligious men and women feign religion and seeing people buy it does not happen in most western countries. In fact, in some places, being a Christian is probably a liability to being elected. My own country Australia has no equivalent to the "Religious Right" although there are some Christians in politics in both major political parties. Yet I should say that the Australian Greens try to pick on any one who is a Christian in politics as among the "Religious Right" and the Greens' idea of secularism means feeding evangelicals to the lions at Stadium Australia as a commemoration to the genius of Nero and for the entertainment of the left-wing intelligentsia. Apparently, it is a good opening act to Keating: The Musical!

On Americans, Religion, and Politics, what would happen if certain persons were to find themselves in heaven?

1. A Democrat: Well I'll be darned, there really is a heaven!
2. A Republican: Wow, heaven sure is shiny, but it ain't as big as Texas!
3. John McCain: Well I'll be darned, there really is a heaven!
4. Barack Obama: Say, why isn't Jeremiah Wright here, he died six months ago?
5. Hillary Clinton: What the heck is my husband doing here? I didn't think that you let adulterers into this place.
6. Mike Huckabee: What, you want me to go back and preach to America that one can be a social conservative and still believe in universal health care and compassionate economics? Lord, even if someone rises from the dead, they will not believe!
7. Mitt Romney: Yes, Lord, I do have bags of money with me, during my life time I found a way to take it with me. Now where are those golden tablets that I heard about?
8. George W. Bush: [Before the seat of judgment] You know, apology is a word that gets used alot these days ...
9. Nancy Pelosi: What are the souls of all these unborn babies doing here, I thought I had them "taken care of"?
10. Colin Powell: I guess I'm here because working for George was kinda like doing purgatory already.

Something to offend everyone!

3 comments:

Stephen C. Carlson said...

I'm not offended, but I cannot figure out why a Democrat and McCain give the same answers. Editing error?

CJW said...

Upon return from exile you might find Australia (now your 'homeland' with the recent introduction of a homeland security ministerial portfolio) now has a religious right.

You're correct to identify the religion of the right as a pretentious expediency, but so too is much of the irreligion of the left. The growth of the militantly irreligious left has been a direct response, and in proportion to, the ascendancy of militantly religious right.

If the Anglican establishment is the Tory party at prayer, then the neocons are simply the religious right at war - and there are plenty of neocons in Oz, and it is nearly impossible to distinguish the theological kind from the political.

Celucien L. Joseph said...

Simply Hilarious!